Elation and Despair: I composed a Chorale Prelude …

Remember, I wrote a fancy last verse arrangement for a hymn, a few weeks ago? Well, yesterday I sallied forth to do my organ practice, and came back determined to go one step better than last time. This time, I wouldn’t write a fancy last verse, oh no!

I’d write a whole chorale prelude. In other words, instead of writing a fancy harmonisation to accompany the congregational singing, I would write a whole solo piece for the organ, and play it before the service. In my own defence, it was Harvest Festival today, which is quite a special occasion, and it’s all the more meaningful in a village church where there are farmers. Yes, I’m sure everyone buys their food in supermarkets, but there’s still a special connection with the land that you wouldn’t find in an urban church.

‘We Plough the Fields and Scatter’

It’s one of my favourite hymns. I was determined to write something fairly slow and gentle, despite its usual brisk and upbeat mood, since no-one really wants the organist belting out something loud and brassy before the service. People do converse – it’s not a recital. The louder you play, the louder people have to shout over you, and it’s easy to ruin any sense of quiet reverence or anticipation.

Ploughing a Lone Furrow?

OK, so I’ve set the scene. It was going to be meditative. I’d have the tune in the left hand, and a couple of bars of accompaniment between each line of the melody. It took most of yesterday afternoon and evening, but once I’m in the flow, I don’t like to stop. (Well, apart from cooking dinner, since families need feeding whether or not the cook fancies herself as a composer. And they like to be fed at set times, alas!)

I got it done and dusted. I have to confess, I was actually rather pleased with my efforts,  last night – I thought it sounded good. (I didn’t force anyone at home to listen to it, because I was wary of an adverse reaction!) Well, that was last night.

I got to church early today, and played it over a number of times before the congregation arrived. It sounded okay – not as glorious as I expected, but certainly passable, apart from a bar or two where I resolved to re-work it later today. Anyway, its premiere performance passed entirely without comment. Oh, well! A bit of an anticlimax, but I’m forced to concede that I was, to a certain extent, indulging myself in any case.

I drove home slightly chastened. How can something sound eminently satisfactory at 10 pm, and … not that special, twelve hours later? What happened overnight?!

I’ve spent another hour tweaking three bars that offended me. I’m sure they’ll make all the difference. Is it finished now? Who knows. 

Maybe Not my Field?

But I definitely won’t be giving up the day job.

Leng Medal Memories – All the Updates so Far!

Since beginning this research into Dundee’s Leng Medal competitions, I’ve posted updates from time to time. Seven of them, to be precise! If you’d like to read more, I’ve put all the links on a special page dedicated to this project:-

Picture of Sir John Leng, MP

We Do Not Know …

I’m re-blogging this post by Will Pooley, because it’s thought-provoking. It’s not about musicology, but history. And as historians, we do not always have neat answers to questions about the past. Read on …

Revisiting my article about Women Composers’ Representation in RCS Whittaker Library

After attending last week’s Donne launch (when I found the opportunity to mention my earlier work in the Whittaker Library), I looked back at my 2023 open access article about increasing women composers’ representation in the Whittaker Library. Just in case you missed it in 2023, here it is again, ‘Representation of Women Composers in the Whittaker Library’. Enjoy! Let me know what you think.

I’m no longer a librarian, focusing solely on my musicological research, but I can still look back with pride on some of my more notable successes. This was definitely one of them.

In Search of the Trumpet Major’s Youngest Daughter.

Working or Not Working?

At home, I wonder if I’m perceived as somewhat perverse and illogical. Why would I want to go out early to examine archival records on a ‘Not Working’ day? (Contractually, Tuesday isn’t a day when I work.)

Should I need to justify myself? Arguably not. However, if retirement offers the opportunity to pursue interests, then surely one should pursue them most vigorously whilst one still has vigour? I’m sure scientists would say this was even good for one’s mental health.

If someone was interested in trains, no-one would think it odd if they wanted to find out where a loco was, at different points in time, and where it went – the track layout and the timetables.  It follows,  then, that real people, especially in your own city, and with a connection to your own institution, are every bit as interesting and worth researching. She was an organist, composer and music teacher.

[Incredulously] How many books? How many hours? Really?

So … I know a lot about the trumpet major’s youngest daughter, but if I find a new avenue to research, then naturally, I want to explore it.ย  And this has been a most interesting and fruitful day, combing through half a dozen large and bulky old handwritten church minutes books.ย  I now know when the lady in question began her quarter century of service as a church organist, and when she resigned. I’ve seen her resignationย  copied into the records. (But it’s unclear precisely why.ย  She gave a slightly vague explanation.ย  Ah, well.)

There’s plenty more in my notes that I shall mull over. Just time for a quick coffee before I examine one last document  …

But she was not buried here!

Too Many Thoughts, Too Little Time! Leng Medal Memories Update No.7.

Silver Leng Medal for singing Scots songs, on blue ribbon

To recap – I have done oral history interviews with a number of people who participated in Dundee’s Leng Medal competitions for Scots song singing – mostly as children, but a few teachers have also talked with me. I’ve checked the transcriptions of 25 out of the total 27 interviews, and I also have a few emailed responses too. If you’re one of the people I’ve interviewed or emailed, then can I offer a big thank you, right now, because I now have lots and lots of information and memories. I really am very grateful. I couldn’t have done this without you. You’ve shared your memories, you’ve made me smile, and some of you have even sung to me. Who could ask for more generosity of spirit than that?

So, what’s next?

Four Nelson's Scots Song Books
  • Writing. (Writing for the popular, non-academic press, and then writing a book chapter.)
  • An event, hopefully. Still under discussion.
  • A book about Thomas Nelson’s educational music publishing, or something along those lines.

And I have more than one string to my bow. I’m also still researching …

The Trumpet Major’s Youngest Daughter

Slightly crumpled conference bag (it has already endured both London and Scottish rain!)

After my talk at the recent Royal Academy of Music conference, Women and Musical Histories, 1789-1914, I have continued researching Rose Smith’s life. I’ve already found out more, and tomorrow I’m off to consult an archive where I hope some of my still outstanding questions might be answered. I foresee a [second, more focused] research trip to Rose’s birthplace in the near future, before our Scottish days get short and wintry!

I’d also like to organise another event! But I really must focus on getting the Dundee research written up and celebrated before I get consumed by this other research thread.

It’s a good thing I’m semi-retired, really! If I was still cataloguing jazz CDs in the library, I certainly wouldn’t have time to plan research expeditions without taking annual leave.

Ink Drawing of a Church Interior (the Most Delightful Discovery)

I shouldn’t be sharing this yet, because I’m sure I haven’t got to the end of this thread. However, it’s too exciting a piece of trivia not to share.

I saw a pen-and-ink drawing of a local church interior, on eBay. Dated 1937, it’s a bit later than the era of that church that interests me. Nonetheless, I thought it would be a nice thing to have.

Last night, I looked up the name of the artist. And it turns out that what I actually have, is a framed drawing done by the rector of the church, made the same year that he took up his charge. Even if I don’t manage to establish any connection with the musical story that I’m working on, I’m delighted to have this piece of artwork just to look at.

So, watch this space. After my forthcoming trip to the archives, maybe I’ll manage to make a connection with the drawing. If I do, my excitement will be off the register. And if not – well, it was still a pleasing acquisition.

Image by congerdesign from Pixabay

PLEASE SHARE THIS! Equality & Diversity in Global Repertoire 2025/26: Launch of Donne Report

Why This Matters:

Here we are in 2026 and women composers still don’t get their share of concert performances. Neither do those from the global majority.  I’d appreciate it if, after reading this post, you could please share it as widely as possible. Thank you!


When I received an invitation to the launch of the Equality and Diversity in Global Repertoire 2025/26 report – at the Royal Albert Hall, no less – I hesitated for only a few seconds – it’s not exactly just down the road! And the trouble with the overnight sleeper (apart from the insomnia) is that you get there far too early…

But, as I outlined in my last post,

If an opportunity presents itself, and you find yourself hesitating, ask yourself this one question:- If I pass this up, am I likely to regret it later? That, rather than other peopleโ€™s opinions, should be your deciding factor.

Karen McAulay Musicologist blog, 22 Sept 2026

You have to be ‘in the room’ to be part of the change you want to see effected.  So, since I had been invited, there I was. 

Gabriella Di Laccio addresses the invited audience

I considered it an honour to attend the launch of the latest report of orchestral performances, comparing ratios of music by men and women, broken down further into music by living and deceased, white and global majority composers. The previous report had actually shown a slight downturn in the figures for women and global minorities, but things were marginally on the up again this year. However, Donne are impatient to see much bigger changes, and much of the talk not only by panellists but also invitees, was about how to quicken the pace.

It depends on so many things – boldness in programming. Funders. It’s not that the will isn’t there, amongst performers – artistic directors also need to be ready to make the changes.  Not just having a ‘token’ woman’s piece on a programme. Capturing the interest of the audience. And recognising that it’s not enough just to premiere a new piece – because often we need to hear something more than once before we feel it’s something we like and would like to hear more of.

https://donne-uk.org/

A distinguished panel had been convened, drawn from PRS Foundation; Black Lives in Music; the Musicians’ Union; one of the Oxford Colleges; and the Association of British Orchestras.

Equality and Diversity in Global Repertoire: 110 Orchestras Worldwide, Orchestras Season 2025-2026 / Donne, 2026.

The 2025/2026 Report.

You can find the report via the Donne – Women in Music Facebook page.  It’s also worthwhile signing up to receive news from Donne (it’s the Italian for ‘women’, so you pronounce it ‘Don-ne‘) – I’ve just received the link to the latest report and highlights from the analysis.

And you’ll also learn about the latest very ambitious initiative, ’50 by 2030′. Donne founder Gabriella Di Laccio, MBE, is impatient to see a 50:50 balance of music by women and men by 2030. The current 8% ‘is not enough’, she says.

(50 by 2030 flyer)

Put that way, who could argue?!

From the floor, we were encouraged to share our own insights.  I hung back, but eventually couldn’t contain myself, and shared my opinion that if we wanted children to know about women’s music, and not just canonical (mostly deceased) white men’s compositions, then most crucially, we needed to target student teachers.  If teachers aren’t sufficiently well-informed about women’s compositions, then the next generation will continue to miss out on what women have created.

I also mentioned my efforts to get as much music by women composers as possible into the Whittaker Library at the Royal Conservatoire of Scotland  particularly in my last five years as a librarian there. (I got applause! There you are – my reward for speaking up.)

After the formal discussions, there was time to network before we all went our separate ways. I caught up with an acquaintance and met lots more.

And managed coffee with our London-based offspring before heading back home. A great day out!


Please don’t forget to share this!

No-one Else Gets to Define You!

Why You Should Read This

I can’t be the only person who has quietly seethed when they feel limitations have been placed on them by someone else! It’s annoying both in everyday life, and when it happens at work. I’ve reached an age where I can see patterns, and when someone else identifies the same thing, then I relate to that! Perhaps you will too.


I donโ€™t spend much time looking at LinkedIn, but I’m glad I did today.  ‘Why your next career step could start with putting your hand up‘, was the eye-catching headline by Gwendoline Cazenave, CEO of Eurostar. You might reasonably ask why I, a semi-retiree, would even think about career steps. But that simply indicates that you don’t know me.

But never let someone else define what is possible for you. 

(Gwendoline Cazenave, Eurostar CEO)

My first thought was the recollection of an indescribably trivial annoyance yesterday. Nothing whatsoever to do with careers, so let’s gloss over that for now.

You Can’t, You Don’t Want to …

And then my mind went back to my well-intentioned, but hardly confidence-instilling mother.

  • ‘Don’t be disappointed if you haven’t passed the 11+.’ (I not only passed it, but got a county scholarship.)
  • ‘You’d better do secretarial training in case your PhD doesn’t get you a job.’ (I didn’t actually finish my first PhD. I did take typing evening classes, which were useful, and a librarianship diploma which kept me employed for four decades.  But I was never a secretary.)
  • ‘I never thought I’d see you pass your driving test.’
  • ‘I couldn’t imagine you having children.’
  • ‘You can’t go on being a church organist when the baby arrives.’ (Three babies, four consecutive organist posts …)
  • ‘You don’t want to apply for a post in the USA.’ (I did want to.) I went for interview and had a fantastic couple of days, but in the end, they didn’t want me. Not a problem, because then …
  • I studied for, and graduated with a PhD, mid-career. I didn’t tell my mother until I’d finished it.  I couldn’t face another ‘you can’t’.

The ‘Bloody Librarian’ Rebels

Things did change. I don’t remember precisely when I was jokingly told, ‘You’re a bloody librarian, woman.’  But I had a PhD, and was fortunate in getting research partial secondments. 

To whichever unidentified academic who once asked my then line-manager, ‘What does a librarian want with a PhD?’, I would invite them to examine my publications record.  I think I can demonstrate what I’ve done with my doctorate!

Another academic asked a subsequent line-manager what a librarian wanted with a teaching diploma.  Do I have to spell it out? (The answer begins with ‘T’ …)

So, you can maybe begin to see why Cazenave’s LinkedIn article struck a chord. But, as I mentioned, I’m semi-retired. What this basically means is that I’m paid to do what I love, one and a half days a week, and I do it anyway, as circumstances permit, the rest of the time. But, because it was initially a struggle to establish myself as an equal academic – albeit only part of my working week – I feel as though I forced that door open, and am going to keep my foot in the door as long as I possibly can. I’m a retired librarian, but I consider myself only a mid-career academic.

I Will Not be Told What I Cannot Do

Cazenave’s article is primarily aimed at folk still going up in their careers.  I have to accept that this is not me. But I keep an eye open for interesting shorter-term opportunities. I’m fortunate to have had two fellowships, at the Universities of St Andrews and Edinburgh. In today’s financially straitened times, I worry for younger people, struggling for a foothold. I realise that there are probably those who think I’m old, have had my turn, and should move aside. But no, I have this expertise  … so why not go on using it?

Moreover, I will not submit to age stereotyping, particularly when you consider that there’s as big a gap between 68 and 90, as there is between 18 and 40. There is no ‘typical’ older person.

  • I will not be consigned to a diet of daytime TV.
  • I generally submit to rigid timetables out of kind consideration to others who need them. But my research is still important! It’s incredibly frustrating to have to leave my laptop mid-paragraph, or be told I’ve taken too long finishing a sentence. I don’t consider I’m being selfish to express this opinion.

The Takeaway

Autobiographical narrative is more helpful if some helpful advice comes out of it, so here’s my advice!

  • Cazenave is right. Never let other people define you.
  • Never accept limitations that others attempt to impose on you.
  • Pick your battles. I accepted that I was stuck with librarianship, but I pivoted to adjust as much of my career as I could. And now, I have to accept that I am not as free as the proverbial bird. But I don’t have to live by a rulebook!
  • Decide what steps you need to take to reach your ultimate goal (preferably!)
  • Now, this may feel like a cop-out, but I think it’s important:- Identify what would be an acceptable and fulfilling compromise, for you. I wasn’t realistically going to be able to get a full-time job in academia, if I couldn’t relocate and had (still have) caring responsibilities.
  • If an opportunity presents itself, and you find yourself hesitating, ask yourself this one question:- If I pass this up, am I likely to regret it later? That, rather than other people’s opinions, should be your deciding factor.

So … ‘Never let someone else define what is possible for you.’ Yesterday, I was informed that I shouldn’t have spent five minutes having a coffee after unpleasant dental treatment.  Says who?

I’ve just been to Edinburgh today, for a joyous semi-retired research day at the National Library of Scotland.  Yesterday, for a few hours it looked as if this might be impossible.  I can’t tell you the joy when I realised that my plans could go ahead.

Having done my research at NLS, did I have coffee afterwards? Hell, yes!  Fate even found me a research friend to have coffee with.

Laundry Maid of All Work?

Children hanging out laundry - a vintage iron-on embroidery transfer.

Further to yesterday’s post, a quaint postscript. I’ve been wondering what to do with an embroidery transfer found amongst my late mother’s sewing things. It’s about 30 x 2″, showing a motif repeated four times: little girls and a baby, hanging out the washing. It’s both cute and politically incorrect – no little boys in sight! (Boys, hang out washing? In the ‘fifties or ‘sixties? Surely not.)

Then it came to me. I’m the mug that gets to hang out the laundry. It’ll make a great border for an apron. Might as well look the part!!

MEMO TO SELF

Better get back to musicology now.